Watching Bones

What a great episode! Pony sex fetish and hypnosis – bet that got your attention! What could be more interesting?

The episode starts with a boy finding a body in the woods. Typical gross Bones episode, right? Seems so, even Bones fights the case when she arrives at the scene to find out the body is still, well, a body – complete with flesh. However as they examine the scene of the crime, they find that the feet have been cut off.

Taking the body back to the lab, they determine that the person had had their wrists bound, had horse feed in their stomach, and showed evidence of wearing a bit. As in a horse’s bit. To make the situation a little lighter, the victim’s name was Ed. The squints and Booth insert “Mr. Ed�? joke here. Bones doesn’t get it. (No surprise there…)

With the body identified, they talk to his wife, who says she thought he was at a work conference. She didn’t know where he was or what he was doing in VA. In the meantime, his work thought he took time off to be with his family.

Bones does research on horses and regales Booth with a few lame horse jokes that to her surprise he knows the punch line to – thanks to his son. They track the victim to a fantasy role playing getaway, The Ambassadora lodge, where people are either horses or riders, with the kinky sex thrown in for good measure. Booth, obviously uncomfortable, argues with Bones about this being “not normal.�?

They manage to find Mr. Ed’s “rider�? and question her. The discover that she knew Mr. Ed was married, but she claims that she didn’t want to marry him, and that she loved him like a girl loves her first pony. She also tells them that she and Mr. Ed were caught by his wife in the stables as she was brushing him down. Later in the car, Bones is throwing out horse facts to Booth and we find out that Booth knows some of his history as well as Bones does.

Booth: Turns out I’m smarter than a 5th grader!

During all of this, Angela is getting ready to be hypnotized to help her remember her husband’s name so they can proceed with tracking him down to get a divorce. She’s not keen on the idea, and seeks out Cam for advice. After reassuring her that hypnotism is a legitimate science and that she had even undergone hypnosis, Angela seems a little more at ease.

While the squints have found that Mr. Ed was murdered by a blow to the head with a hoof pick, Booth and Bones go back to talk with Mr. Ed’s wife and confront her about knowing where her husband was. She admits she lied, but says she did so to protect her children from their father’s perversion. She says she went to the “pony ranch�? after receiving a phone call from someone with an English or Australian accent. Back at the “pony ranch,�? Booth and Bones find the only man with an accent, and after a little pushing from Bones, he finally admits to making the call, but denies the murder.

Booth: What’s with all the lying? We’ve got voice tapes and public displays of sexual paraphernalia.
Bones: I was role playing. It’s being all lard ass and good cop.
Booth: Hard ass and bad cop, Bones, hard ass and bad cop.

Back at the lab, Hodgins and Zach have arrived at the same conclusion at the same time. Mr. Ed’s feet were cut off by the same weapon that killed him – the hoof pick. Zach doesn’t allow Hodgins to get his discovery out before he reveals that he’s discovered the same.

Hodgins: You suck all the fun out of every moment of personal triumph!

After their last dead end, Hodgins’ discovery of the specialized twine used to tie Mr. Ed’s hands leads Booth and Bones back to the pony ranch and it’s owner, Lucky. They also uncovered that Lucky and Mr. Ed’s rider, Annie Oakley, used to be married. Doesn’t look good for Lucky. He admits to using the twine, but argues that any one of his customers could have taken it off of a bale of hay. He also admits to owning a hoof knife, but said it was stolen four days ago. He also offers a potential suspect – a butcher and former pony-player who broke into his truck the night before Mr. Ed, and his hoof knife, went missing.

When Booth and Bones get to the butchers to question the guy, he immediately looks guilty as he runs.

Bones: Stop! Or I’ll kick you in the testicles!
Booth grabs the man, throws him against the building, knocking him out.
Bones: Wow! You are strong!
Bones: Well, you know, I try to stay in shape. Stop, or I’ll kick you in the testicles?
Bones: Well, it worked.
Booth: Tell you what, you and me, we’re going to work on the cop talk.

Later, they discover that he ran because he deserted the National Guard and was afraid he’d been caught. Since it turns out he has an alibi, it’s back to the lab. At a closer look at Mr. Ed’s body, Bones discovers that his eyes weren’t eaten by the bugs, but rather gouged out with – you guessed it – the hoof knife. The precision used to cut off his feet and all the other evidence points to someone when wasn’t afraid or queasy with blood. Most likely, a butcher – or a doctor. Their butcher had a alibi, but it turns out that Annie Oakley is a doctor.

Cam’s discovery that Mr. Ed showed signs of sex before his murder takes them back to the pony ranch to talk to Annie. When confronted, she sends Lucky to get another player who is a lawyer, but when left alone with Booth and Bones, she cracks as they lay out the scene of the crime for her. Apparently they read it right, because she admits that she killed him because she had left her husband and another player for him, but he was going back to his wife.

Angela’s session with the hypnotist doesn’t go so well as she sees a giant wasp instead of her husband. Feeling disappointed, she leaves the office but discovers the meaning of her subconscious reaction when she remembers what book she was reading in Fiji when she was married. She finds the book and inside is a photo of her husband, complete with his first name on the back.